Casting choices, stage sets, and spider jump scares overwhelm Takane’s Eternal Virgin Road.
Episode 11 — “I’ll Let You Do a Dry Run”
Takamine-san Makes Me Go Hmm.
Lazy authors often use a deus ex machina to write themselves out of a corner. In Takamine-san’s case, a dump truck ex machina. Anime shows, especially in the isekai genre, have made truck-kun the plot device of choice to quickly move characters into another world or another dramatic arc. A truck (literally) comes crashing through left field, and the characters must pick up the pieces. Truck-kun is how you shake an Etch-a-Sketch to reset it! But did the writers for Takamine-san unironically take Ouji out with Dump Truck-kun? I see hints of an inside joke in the situation.
First, the anime’s premise has been a fantastical farce from the beginning. A girl suddenly developed the ability to rewind time by removing her underwear after a moment of public embarrassment. That’s the thinnest wisp of a premise to show a sexy woman in ecchi situations. Second, Takamine-san is a self-referential comedy. It has repeatedly employed sight gags of porn industry magazines, videos, and websites. So, why wouldn’t it make fun of the romantic drama genre that uses car accidents to flip the script to keep a series going instead of finally ending it? Here, a dump truck ex machina grants Takane’s wish for Koushi to rise above his self-esteem issues.
Is that too meta? Too inside baseball for the anime? Perhaps. I would have inserted a cut-scene of a manga cover and a dump truck bearing down on Ouji with cliché isekai text all over it. Because it’s more than likely that a dump truck ex machina really was Takamine-san’s last resort for a lazy writer.
Heh.
Oh! The vote for the Cinderella stage roles happens right now in Takamine-san! How will Koushi campaign and convince others to vote for him? Uh, he won’t. One vote! Devastating victory for Ouji. But who voted for Koushi if he didn’t vote for himself? Takane will never tell. However, she achieved her goal of making Koushi volunteer for another role that spends as much time onstage as Prince Charming.
A Cinderella Story for Takamine-san
Koushi’s classmates don’t know who he is or why he would get any attention from President Takamine. Oops. Koushi made a mistake, and his classmates complained about it. Takane won’t allow that! It must be nice for Takamine-san’s producers to have the entire Eternal Virgin Road sequence to pad animation time. Takane (still playing the tsundere) claims she would prefer a perfectly painted stage backdrop for her scenes on stage. Sure. It’s not about other students bullying Koushi. Har. Here’s the hidden sex scenario while talking to someone around the corner. Come on, Koushi. You should be familiar with sliding Takane’s panties up her legs and smooth backside by now. Takane has low-rider panties, but that’s not how they’re supposed to work! Ah. Takane pulled up her panties through active movements.
Montage for final night preparations of a cultural festival. I don’t believe it. The night sky in Takamine-san is impossible to recreate in an urban setting due to light pollution. But its pastel colors add to a romantic rooftop scene. Takane explains that tonight is her last opportunity to view late-night skies before the school’s cultural festival, because seniors will prioritize college entrance exams next year. Koushi argues that they can have overnight activities at college. No, not like that! Can Takane bring herself to be honest about her feelings for Koushi before the season finale? Of course not! Stupid Koushi. He interrupted her love confession! Missed opportunities…
The Takamine-san intermission scenes show Takane wearing warm clothes (like she should have on the school roof) and hotter underwear.
What a Tangled Web Takamine-san Weaves!
It’s festival day! Koushi and Takane’s class has time before their dress rehearsal before they perform Cinderella in front of the public. The kids have enough time for fun and to tour exhibits and booths. Oh? Foreshadowing. Prince Charming hasn’t arrived at school yet. Takane still has eyes only on Koushi, though. The kid is nervous and needs something to take his mind off stage fright. How about a personal tour with the school president? Oof. Takane’s fans don’t like how she’s holding some cipher’s hand.
First up — The Haunted House of Spiders! Uh oh. Takane is a scaredy-cat! I thought only thunder frightened her (Takamine-san, episode 5). Kawaii! How will she talk her way out of this? Listen to her scream! Oh boy. Will she run out of underwear if she rewinds all her embarrassing moments? She’s not fooling Koushi by putting on a brave face. Grabbing a girl’s ankle has upskirt angles written all over it. Those spider people are giving Koushi the time of his life. Oh no. Koushi hasn’t put replacement lingerie back on Takane. She can’t use Eternal Virgin Road! Still talking tough, though. Uh oh. The girls behind them in the haunted house have caught up to Koushi and Takane. What if they see her? Acting! Brilliant! Thank you!
Takamine-san — Bait and Switch!
Oh, right, Takane. Keikakudoori. Koushi relaxed and acted in front of other people. She loves it when a plan (fabrication) comes together! Hey, do you remember how Koushi only received one vote to play Prince Charming? Guess who really decided. Truck-kun! Well, Dump Truck-kun. Ouji didn’t isekai to another world, but he can’t play Prince Charming. And Takane chose not to rewind time to avoid Ouji’s accident. Koushi has always been her Prince, and now the whole school will see it!
Haite Kudasai, Takamine-san (Please Put Them On, Takamine-san) streams the “least-censored web version” on Crunchyroll in English audio and subtitles in multiple languages. These recaps and reviews will feature the most “cultured” broadcast version.
Did Takane awaken a new fetish in you? Spider web bondage? Monster girls are famous for being thirst traps, but not like this! I’m surprised Takane didn’t wet herself. That’s more in line with her personal history. What other sexy scenarios can you imagine happening in a haunted house? Let us know in the comments below!
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