Episode 22 — “Christmas Party!”
Bathos Melodrama Meter
Through 22 episodes of Goddess Café Terrace, I can safely say that Kouji Seo uses his bathos formula best for comedy instead of pathos. That’s why I appreciated Shiragiku’s heavy feelings about how Hayato was so blasé about her kiss on his lips. The anxiety about a relationship changing from friendship to something more after a blatant declaration of romantic feelings fits very much into your bookstore’s young adult romance section. Shiragiku’s pathos is palpable. How can someone ignore her first kiss? But Goddess Café Terrace played the long game through Riho trying to weaponize Shiragiku’s alcohol-induced horniness.
In the first episode, Riho schemed to collect blackmail material after pointing a drunk naked girl at him. 21 episodes later, Riho tried to aim the same drunk horny girl at Hayato to sabotage her chances at harem advancement. What does this prove? First, Riho’s attempts at playing the villainess always benefit her friends, intentionally or not. Second, Shiragiku’s melodramatic ambush of Hayato to discuss deep feelings devolved into a comedic anticlimax. The Goddess Café Terrace bathos formula worked again! Even better, Ami’s outrageous help revealed the secret everyone had kept from Shiragiku after they became roommates. My only concern after this episode is if Shiragiku stops her horny drunkenness by avoiding liquor. My bet: the sexy accidental alcohol scenes will involve Rube Goldberg-esque levels of machinery and machination. Wet wipes and fancy chocolates better receive an upgrade.
Protecting the Nest Points
None of Hayato’s properties needed defending, but we should look at who protected his “property” the most in Goddess Café Terrace. Ririka and Hekiru sought compensation for the devaluation of his lips in the name of “justice” for stolen kisses that belonged to their clients. But they lost all rights to Hayato’s “property” after Judge Mao (who always prefers group sensuality) awarded his lips to four other parties.
Goddess Café Terrace Grandma’s Little Girl Points
I debated who among the characters displayed a direct connection to Grandma Sachiko the most. Was it Hayato because he brought Sachiko’s portrait and the namesake cat to a Christmas party? Or was it Sachiko Kitty for keeping the peace at the expense of Riho’s wrath? My scale tips toward Hayato.
Baka Charm Points
How do we assess points after the farcical mock trial about Hayato’s stolen lips in which everyone has agreed to participate? I saw evidence of how boring the week between Christmas and New Year’s Day can be. I liked how cute Ami and Valentina were, enough for Moemi and Shiragiku to kick them out of the kitchen. But that doesn’t count for Goddess Café Terrace harem points if Hayato doesn’t see it. So, Shiragiku wins the most points because he had to reveal her drunken, amorous, kitten, male sweat-sniffing behavior to prove that he did not intentionally ignore her kiss’s emotional importance. What a way to learn one’s character defects aren’t deepfakes!
Goddess Café Terrace Drunk Girl Points
No one needed alcohol to show off their fetishes in this episode. Mao volunteered all the information Hayato required to be wary and intrigued about her bedroom behavior. The pair would most assuredly fight over which holes and toys they would shove into each other. Funnily enough, Ami recognizes how Shiragiku acts like a cat as she comes sniffing around Hayato’s body parts. Shiragiku is her grandmother’s granddaughter.
Cool Charm Points
Akane tried to play it cool against Hekiru’s theory of her losing harem-heroine actions. But what worked on Hayato’s attention was the gap between Akane’s aloofness and her little girl’s scaredy-cat mode. These days, the concept of “moe” gets little attention, but that is pure moe.
Goddess Café Terrace Makes Me Go Heh.
Oh boy. Hayato believes a Christmas party with a group of girls will be free of the “messiness about romance.” Fat chance! Funny. Mao wants romantic shenanigans at their party. Doujin writers, start your stylus pads! We need Mao’s paizuri techniques in parody books about Goddess Café Terrace! I like how the Chiyoda Diner girls have kept up with their personality pairs, except for Ouka. I can’t see how well she could mesh with Mao unless we learn more about Ouka’s humiliation fetish.
Aw. Poor Hekiru. Akane hasn’t accepted her as a wordsmith partner. The aspiring novelist knows all the harem competition rules. Akane put herself in last place because she proposed to Hayato first! The girl in a harem who makes the first move never wins! Will that rule apply in Goddess Café Terrace? Ohoho! Hekiru’s horse race system fits the metaphor of Ami as the dark horse. My theory is Hayato eventually chooses Ami because she most resembles his future daughter. Well, the daughter looks like Sachiko’s twin in her younger days. But Ouka makes a convincing showing for winning the heroine horse race, according to Hekiru.
Oops. Goddess Café Terrace missed an opportunity to make Ami yell “pinchos!” repeatedly. But Valentina is there to help Moemi switch personalities. Ami forgot that Shiragiku only does her “nyaa-nyaa” sounds after liquor enters her system. Hahaha! She kicked the youngsters out of the kitchen. “Go play outside!” Uh oh. Shiragiku lost heroine places if we followed Hekiru’s rules. Open declarations of marital intentions this early would doom her chances. The three heroines feel extra pressure to move ahead during the Christmas party. Har. Hayato brings Sachiko Kitty along. The cat has joined the Familia.
Goddess Café Terrace Plays Harem Reindeer Games
Let the harem games begin! Oh, Riho. That idea won’t work. She’s only good at manipulating others for their benefit, not hers. How will things backfire? Alcohol can’t work on Shiragiku if she can’t drink it. Stay on Riho’s good side, Sachiko-chan. Ack! Scaredy-cat Akane hangs on to Hayato’s arm. Riho lost her chances to get ahead during the Christmas Eve party. Ha. Goddess Café Terrace merely inverted colors for Riho’s shocked face.
More Christmas jokes! Hayato had a 10 percent chance of drawing Mao’s gift. Can he still use her “versatile” vibrating gift on himself? Mao knows where Hayato can “shove it.” Fujoshi Hekiru approves! Poor, pure Ouka. The mosaic censorship made that scene worse than it was. Hahaha! Of course. Of course! Ami and Valentina’s Spinning Tornado struck again. Snow already. Merry Christmas! Shiragiku gave Hayato an unambiguous kiss on the lips!
Shiragiku’s Shocking Revelation!
Any changes between Hayato and Shiragiku? No! Bring on the mopey romantic drama. Ami’s rubber ducky is the enemy of all otakus of culture. Here we go — Shiragiku went on a fishing expedition (literally) looking for answers. Is this the moment Goddess Café Terrace chose? When Shiragiku learns how affectionate her drunk blackout antics are? Ami has video proof! Rescind the top-secret classification! It’s not a deepfake, Shiragiku. Accept reality and fight your fate! Uh oh. That was Hayato’s first kiss. You know what that means! Shiragiku rushed ahead of the horses in the harem race!
Objection, Goddess Café Terrace!
Ah, yes. The days between Christmas and New Year’s Day are slow for business. What better way to waste time than to hold a mock trial? How long before we get an Ace Attorney reference? Hahaha! How do you get damages back from a stolen first kiss? Recriminations and accusations! I knew that eryngii mushroom would reappear in Goddess Café Terrace soon enough. It’s out in the open: Shiragiku has a smell fetish. Objection! Overruled! The stolen property has no human rights! What a farce! I love it. We should have expected this kind of judgment from Mao — the group sex fanatic decided that the other Familia girls get a kiss from Hayato!
Next time, the sexy hunt for Hayato’s lips begins in earnest. Ganbare, Akane-chan! Sachiko Kitty blocks Akane’s, er, kitty from view. Move!
Goddess Café Terrace (The Café Terrace and Its Goddesses, Megami no Café Terrace) streams on Crunchyroll in Japanese audio and multiple language subtitles.
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Did you enjoy how long it took Shiragiku to find out her deep, dark, drunk secret? What a Christmas present! I liked how much fun the characters had during their winter off-time. Should Goddess Café Terrace have more episodes like this one? Let us know in the comments below.
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