Obviously, each country has a unique list of topics that are appropriate for discussion, and others that should be avoided. Here’s a post about some of the subjects that would be considered rude in Japan, plus some that are surprisingly okay to talk about.
6 Discussion Topics That are Considered Rude in Japan
Politics
Unsurprisingly, politics isn’t a topic you lightly discuss in casual conversion. Japan is a modern constitutional democracy based on the British Parliamentary system, with nine national political parties. These fall into five major groupings:
- The ruling Liberal Democratic Party, which is right-of-center, pro-business, and supportive of Japan’s close relationship with the U.S.
- The “major opposition party du jour,” which is currently the Constitutional Democratic Party, but has been constituted as the People’s Progressive Democratic Party and the Democratic Party of Japan. Members of this party support worker and consumer protections over business.
- The Komeito, a large minority party historically linked to the Sokka Gakkai evangelical Buddhist religion, is known as SGI internationally.
- The Japanese Communist Party, actually one of the oldest in the world. You gotta give them props for sticking to their guns for so long.
- A plethora of smaller parties focused on specific issues, such as issues related to Okinawa or the Party to Protect People from NHK, which seeks to abolish the required monthly fee all households must pay.
A friend of ours is a member of the Sokka Gakkai religion, and whenever election season comes around he makes an excuse to visit my wife and politely asks that if she doesn’t have a candidate she’s supporting, would she consider voting for the Komeito candidate?
Talking About Religion is Rude in Japan
The Japanese are a famously laissez faire on the subject of religion, officially being a Buddhist country but generally turning to various religious traditions at different times of life, for example getting celebrating the birth of a child at a Shinto shrine, having a Western Christian marriage then turning to Buddhist themes for funerals. Some of the major religious groups are:
- People who were raised Buddhist but consider themselves as having no religion… until their parents die, and they suddenly realize they’d better learn what they’re supposed to do to protect the family grave. There are many sects of Buddhism, such as Tendai and Nichiren, and I’ve learned it’s common for people here to not know what sect they’re part of.
- People who are Shinto, specifically following Japan’s original religion that finds kami in natural objects.
- Christians of many surprising flavors, from Catholics to Mormons to Jehova’s Witnesses, though the overall numbers are small, around 1% of the population. On my first weekend in “un-religious Japan”, I was invited to attend a local Japanese Baptist church and was impressed at what kind and welcoming people everyone was.
Discussing Historical Background Would be Rude
When Japanese people meet foreigners, they’re fascinated by the way we usually have mixed backgrounds, for example, my Irish and English heritage through my various ancestors. While this might be fun for Japanese people to ask foreigners about, the reverse is probably not a good idea, as it could lead to unexpected results.
Asking a Woman her Age
Obviously, the subject of a woman’s age is a delicate subject, wherever you go. Even if she’s still trying to make it big as an idol.
The Japanese Royal Family
You know a topic is considered delicate when I can’t find a single related anime or manga image for a blog post, but apparently, it’s taboo to draw or create media about the Japanese Imperial Family. In general, discussing opinions on the Imperial Family is something that could be considered rude in Japan.
But What Isn’t Considered Rude in Japan?
There are some topics that would be quite scandalous to discuss in the West, which the Japanese are surprisingly okay with addressing.
Discussing Your Weight
Japan is famous for being a slender nation, with the average weight being 62.5 kg / 137 lbs for males and 52.9 kg / 116 lbs for females. Perhaps because the number of overweight people is so low here, making small talk about a person’s bulk (“Did you gain weight since the last time I saw you?”) is not considered rude in Japan. (Though I would refrain from doing it, just in case.)
Asking the Cost of an Expensive Purchase
In America, it’s rude to ask the price of an expensive automobile or house. Like the above example, this is less of a taboo than in the West, and if asked a Japanese might answer honestly.
Masturbation
I’ll never forget one night when I was in an izakaya bar and a male patron next to me wanted to ask me a question. “Which do you prefer, masturbation or sex with a woman?” It was, to say the least, not a subject I’d ever been asked about before, and I gave my answer that there was certainly a time and a place for both. Japan’s tendency to say shikata ga nai (“it can’t be helped”) on topics like masturbation is one thing I love about the country.
Bonus Taboo Topic: Foreskins
One topic that seems to be especially sensitive in Japan is male foreskins. If you browse through the adult magazines J-List sells, you’ll probably see advertisements promoting various foreskin-related medical services. These include circumcision for men who want that, as well as surgery to fix phimosis, which is a medical condition that keeps the foreskin from being pulled all the way back, which seems to be a big deal among Japanese men.
This cultural obsession with phimosis turns up in some strange places, for example, J18’s hentai doujinshi Usami Life, in which a character enters a relationship with his (bunny girl) teacher in part because he’s embarrassed about his penis. The topic also shows up in Nympho Sensei Ryoko, about an amorous teacher who wants to teach her students healthy sex practices. What an interesting cultural hang-up to discover!
Thanks for reading this post about discussion topics that would be considered rude in Japan. Got any comments or questions? Post them below, or on Twitter!
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